coffee shop failure

Got up earlier, which is good. Had a small toast breakfast. Today is a hat hair day. Left the apartment at around 1pm. Walked to Coffee Time and got a cookie and caramel with steamed milk. In a few hours of sitting I accomplished very little. Though The Gift is reading a lot faster now that I am past the introduction.

I spent most of the day picking up The Gift and putting it down and picking it up again. Took out the trash. Did the dishes. It is interesting, I just can't keep my mind on it. I'm having real focus issues. But seeing as how tomorrow is a big "lots of stuff to get done for Thesis Writing & Research" day, I'll probably be more productive. And when I'm not being productive on my book reading, I'll draw portraits. But my tellie doesn't come on till later..soooo. Yeah.

Goddamn. I hate feeling like a failure. I feel like I am not working nearly hard enough. Not reading enough. Not drawing enough. It has been a month and I have no pieces printed. What the hell? Gaaahh.

Todays Portrait Is: Matt Wilson.

soba!

It is utterly impossible to roll out of bed before noon. Blah.

The main problem with my thesis is trying not to try to hard. I was drawing Karen today and all the images were so forced. They didn't have the naturalness. Some were good, but the proportions were inexcusably off, and not just "full of heart" off. But I'm also not fully done with the images. They still need to be shaded. So they are not finished. I think I'll try drawing smaller. It is better to draw small and good than big and empty.

Anyway. Had my usual massive scramble. Now I'm out of beef again. But plenty of eggs. Need to get some mayo. And bread. I'm so uncreative with food. Oh well.

Yoga was restorative today. Longer held poses. Lots of twists. Some strain. But it was nice. I like having yoga in my life. I wonder what will happen when I graduate.

Afterwards I drew Karen in the print lab for a bit. Like I said, the drawings were just not natural. Trying way too hard. I think I should do smaller images. And draw faster. Draw like the zine. After that I finished up my print portfolio piece. For a wide open studio, there wasn't a lot of people there today. Just me and Yoshi. Then Lacey, Karen, and I went to Mio Sushi. I had rice, some shrimp ebi, and soba noodles. Because I haven't had soba noodles in a while. They were good, though kind of one note. We ate Lacey's vegetables. I'm now at the place in my life where I eat OTHER PEOPLE'S veggies. Whaaa. I'm a grow up and stuff, I guess. We had a great conversation about art and our art practices and how we relate to our different mediums. It was lovely.

Went home. Watched Fringe. Worked on drawing portraits some more. Now I'll go to bed and try to get up and do some reading. I think if I incentive myself to get a caramel steamer, I can go get some reading in a cafe done.

Todays Portrait Is: Andy Pilarski.

why is he in a wedding dress?

Last day with ever so slightly swollen eye. All though going fresh faced is a nice change of pace. Need to not be "reliant" on makeup. It needs to be fun.

Got up. Laid out my clothes. Had some breakfast. Showered. Went to school. Scanned. Went to class. Critiqued. There are some cool looking visual recipes happening. Sneezed a bunch for no reason. Got a sandwich from Quizno's for lunch. Beef dip. Mmmm. During lunch I watched Community with Madeline and Kristen. Jeff was all "is that the Dungeons and Dragons episode?" and I was all "yes!". Back in class we looked at some CSS websites and then it was open work time. I noodled about a bit. After class I went to my studio, prepared to leave, then remembered I had time to print, so I went to print. I had to keep reapplying tape on my screen, because of a blotch in my transfer. So there was a part that was printing ink that I didn't want to print ink, but because it is silk and a bit damp, the tape kept coming off. Argh. But I did get a layer done. Went home for a little bit. Went back to school.

YOGA WAS BRUTAL. Lots of thigh work. And back stuff. But mostly thighs. We did some insane moves. I felt brutalized after. But in a good way. Diana picked me up from home and we went to BT, Karen, and Phil's for the night. Evan and Holly were there as well as Lacey and Mel. They were watching Zardoz. I worked on some sketches. Mostly chilled though. Drank a beer. Mel left. Dom came. Phil and Diana played Katamari Damacy. Jalissa and Morgan B. came over too. And that was fun. It was a good little joking crowd. A nice night with friends. I have pictures but I'll post them later. Diana drove Lacey and I back. Now I'm going to chill. Drink some water. Tomorrow is yoga, drawing Karen for thesis, and maybe more printing. Or reading.

Todays Portrait Is: Craig Wheat and Cat.

Auntie Brynne's Chili (sketch)

Sketch for a visual recipe.

Rougly 17"x7". Graphite on paper.

Recipe courtesy of my aunt Brynne.

what a crock (pot)

It's weird. Once reading gets labeled as "research" I don't want to do it. I'm so behind in my reading. Just can't get around to doing it. Got around to doing other things.

My eye was barely puffy and barely hurt this morning. Hurrah, it is almost healed! I'll still live it alone for another day or so. Nursing it with a wet cloth is quite soothing.

At 4ish, I went to school to get to my print portfolio. The lab was pretty full of people carving and printing. So I got my screen and paper ready to go. And then I waited. Waited for the class to be over so I could nab some space. Amazing how many of the students actually sat around using the whole damn class time. What the hell kids? You are supposed to leave at 3pm! That's how normal students do it (not me though, I'm also responsible). I got one layer done (there is also a class at 6:30 pm). It is going to take so many early mornings once I actually get cracking on printing my thesis. Not looking forward to a reasonable sleep schedule. Bleh. Afterwards, Karen, Lacey and I went to Yur's for dinner. I had a grilled cheese and a couple Sessions. We talked Doctor Who (Karen doesn't like it but she started in the Matt Smith episodes, and with ones that don't show off the show in its best lights. Diana, who had joined us, and I agreed that The Empty Child and The Doctor Dances would be an excellent place to start). We talked thesis. We talked and talked. Then went our separate ways. I pulled up my television queue and started working on my illustration homework. It's 17"x7" just about, and it is an illustrated recipe. I'll scan it tomorrow and show you guys.

It is just a sketch, to be finished over the coming week. But it looks good. I'm excited for it.

Also I forgot to mention that two mornings ago I fell in the shower. Nothing major. Mostly just banged my side. I completely forgot about it till I lay down that same day. Still, a scary thing in the moment.

Todays Portrait Is: Olivia Britz.

eye see

Woke up with my puffy eye even puffier. Still no symptoms of pink eye, just regular old eye sty. Looked up sty on MayoClinic.com (WebMD should be avoided, thanks to my lovely yoga instructor Fawn for the health care searching advice) and followed the advice of a compress. The swelling went down. Still hurts a very little bit. Mostly just sore type of hurting. I'm just going to wait it out. For a second I was thinking about going to the clinic, but that is just me being a hypochondriac. I'll wait and see and if it gets worse or changes, I'll go. But for now, I'll stick with compresses.

Took my sweet time getting out of the house today. Had a second meal before I left, just to make sure I wasn't starving by the time yoga rolled around. It was good that I got to school when I did, before I forgot about print lab congestion. The class was just getting over with when I arrived. Boy, I remember a time when there was a full open lab day. Tomorrow there is also a class and I'm not sure if I should go SUPER early and print before it and get other stuff done in the mean time while they are in critique (they might be in critique, but if they are not, then I can work because the Screen & Relief class is still in Relief). Or do I wait till 5 and print straight through and listen to my audio book. Wednesday sucks for television anyway. I like the sound of the latter. Go late, take no risk and work work work. Instead of hitting the alarm a bunch of times and then taking a nap for four hours. I'll get to my reading tomorrow instead. But back to today. Today I took my paper to the chopper at school and chopped it into a very nicely cut 10"x10" stack. It looks so perfect and ready for printing. After that I played with my print pieces and thought about how they will be arranged on the paper. Before I knew it, it was time for yoga!

A lot of knee work today. Felt good. Got nice and warm. It hasn't been as cold these past few days, which is nice. After yoga I returned home. Worked on drawing stuff mostly. Nibbled on some more food. Contemplated tomorrow. The problem with not over scheduling myself, is when I leave the schedule open I accomplish less. I need to do better about setting firmer goals, instead of leaving things aside. Right now: print portfolio. Right after that: illustration recipe thingy. Right after that: draw people. THESIS! Right after that: work on mind map and writing. I've been doing tons of mind maps, though now we need to perform our mind map for the class. In some sort of performing monkey show.

Did you know Netflix has Top Gear on instant watch? Glee was good I guess. I like when we get character internal monologues. Raising Hope was funny. My eye sty is doing much better. I just put a cold cloth on it and the swelling goes right down. Hurrah! Guess it will be a lipstick only couple days. Oh well. My skin is looking great though. I think I may have nailed a routine that works. Cleanse every night. Use the gentle scrub every other morning. Once a week use the intense scrub.

Todays Portrait Is: Phil Bone.

preliminary thesis sketches

pen in moleskin.

unopen open time

Woke up with a sore puffy eyelid. The puffyness is barely noticeable, and I only really feel the soreness when I squint. Probably just a stye. See how it is tomorrow.

Another week starts. Another busy week. Got up early to work on stuff. Worked on sorting my bibliography. Ate a scramble. Yum yum yum. Big breakfasts are good things. Went to school at 12:30 and worked on the computers there, because it is much easier to use Zotero at school. Went to Utrecht and dropped some cash on paper for the print portfolio. Sketched and read during the time I had left. In class we mainly talked about format and our reactions to the reading and the stuff we worked on. Class moved pretty slow, but it moved. During break I scanned my thesis sketches and mailed them off to Martin. It wasn't the most eventful of classes. But we have 10 pages of our thesis paper due in two weeks. EEEEEKK!! Need to get on with my reading.

My next week doesn't have a lot of given responsibilities. It looks relatively open, but I know I have a lot of general work that needs doing. Printing and reading mostly. I'm drawing Karen on Friday. Need to order paper to print on. Reading and yoga and printmaking.

Back at home I ate some pasta and salad. Watched House. Drew some portraits. Drew the last piece for my print portfolio piece. Relaxed. Tomorrow I'll get up and get to work. Chop the paper down. Work on the layout. Maybe print a few layers. We'll see.

Todays Portrait Is: Kasia Alexander.

journey to the east

Something happened with my alarm and it didn't go off like it ought. Still, I wasn't in bed too late. Got up. Showered. Had my usual breakfast. Then I decided I would go drop off my pieces, no matter how long the bike ride. The show is a Thing-A-Day type thing, but only for January. Not a 365 project. So I swung by school and photocopied my first months worth of Portraitoday. Then I headed down to Couch via 9th. Then down to Naito Parkway via Couch. Got onto Hawthrone Bridge off of Naito. But I took a weird turn off and got onto Clay, and then 7th. Turned left onto Harrison. Rode straight on Harrison, all though not totally straight because there was a large roundabout and a few square gardens to zig around. The Harrison Street neighborhood is quite nice. Eventually I got up the hill to 28th and found St. David's Episcopal Church. That was where the drop off was. I dropped my stuff off. Filled out a form. Then I sat and caught my breath and relaxed a bit from my very long multiple mile bike ride. Whew! After I felt relaxed enough to hop on the bike, I did.

I zoomed down Harrison, and went over to Hawthorne by 12th. Stopped at Burgerville and got some burgers and a soda. Yum! Then I went over the bridge. Swung by Pioneer Place Mall and picked up a cheap loop to put in my one piercing hole. Maybe I'll get the other one pierced one of these days. Third times the charm? Rode back home. Talked to mom for a bit.

Went to Trader Joe's. Got some apples and food stuffs. Salad! Tabitha and Kristen were getting their hair did by this lady tonight. Highlights and a cut (I think) for Kristen, new nice shade of blonde and a good cut for Tabitha. I sat in my room reading and drinking tea. Now I shall read some more. And then draw while watching Top Gear and Shameless and Episodes. But first, more reading.

Todays Portrait Is: Casey Hatfield.