love mondo's designs and use of pattern

I've been in such a fog and a mood. Every time I think about my project I have to back track and think about what it means and what it could mean and what I will talk about. I did come up with two different point of views and stuff, really general poorly written view points. But it just feels forced. I still want to do it, but it shouldn't be a struggle to find a meaning in what you do? Right? I mean, all art is sort of a self portrait and finding how it reflects you shouldn't be that impossible? What do I want to reflect and talk about.

It's hard. It's like trying to nail a fish to a wall, except you don't have a hammer or nails...so you just have this wall and this fish and no idea how to get the two to stick. Or something.

Chocolate croissants. Went to Friday yoga. It was a more relaxing, stretching, meditating form of yoga that helped center me for as long as it lasted. Which wasn't long enough. Drat.

And then I wasted the day in a slumpy mood. Not good Trillian. Not good. But I don't know how to get out of it. I don't know how to take that next step. That one that leads to utter excitement.

I need to read something. Find a fact that interests me. Some little kernel to clutch onto. It is a numbing panic I am experiencing.

Oh, have I told you what I know about pigs?

bye bye jay

Thursday

Got to school in perfect time. Whoo! In animation we discussed the reading. We broke into groups and then each group presented their consensus on the reading. As always I volunteered to go first because it is easiest to just get it out of the way like that. After that we talked about film scene composites and studied The Birds and the 8 different components of something something. For lunch Kristen and I went to Hot Lips and got pizza and breadsticks. Yum. Tabitha joined us. We chatted about stuff and some lady shook her head at us. We were not being vulgar, just opinionated. Ha!

Anyway, back in class we studied Hedgehog in the Fog and watched a bit of a documentary on Yuriy Norshteyn, who made the animation. Totally brilliant. Really intense drawing cut out stuff that is just flawless. Then we split into groups. One half studied cut out shape animation, and the other (mine) learned about the stop motion program Dragon. Pretty insane motion capture. It is what Laika uses. Laika did Coraline. Apparently after every stop motion frame, it took a minute and a half to process the image through the servers before it even came back to the computer. A minute and a half. Per frame. There are a ton of frames in a movie. Insaaane.

Cotey, TJ, and I animated some dinosaurs. Tippi helped. We got our stuff done which ended up being our homework so that is done. Whoo! Well it was some figures that move in on another one. I'll upload it eventually. The program and set up limitations are pretty intense, I don't know how much stop motion I'll be doing. I like drawing. But yeah. It took over an hour to do a simple animation moving five figures about for 8 seconds.

I returned home for break. Ate some mac and cheese. Picked up some art books. Got back to class right on time. We discussed our ideas for missing portfolio pieces and then talked about how we might construct our portfolios. I have a pretty good idea for mine. It will be a mailable fold out poster, instead of a book.

After break we finished up class with a documentary on the awesome Milton Glaser. The scope of his work is spectacular. And he got no money for the I ♥ NY design. NONE. But he didn't seem bitter about it. With that done, Karen and I drove over to the Florida Room to bid Jay farewell.

Jay is leaving for Oakland, with the intention to move to San Francisco. I know it won't be the last time that I see her and I'm so proud of her and she will go spectacular things. Still, she has left. Bought some drinks and some food and then a couple more drinks....haa. It didn't get crazy, I just wasn't paying enough attention. Thank god for designated drivers. Tabitha, Mel, Kristen, Heather, Danny, BT, Brandis, Dominic, Jax, Travis, and others came. It was a good little party. I cried. About three times. Not sobbing, just crying and hugging. Karen got me home and I just sort of shuffled into bed with my water bottle. Delicious delicious water.

Now I need to go to move to Monterey, which is close to San Fran.

Friday

Woke up to some text messages early on and couldn't fall back asleep. Spent two dreary hours watching Top Gear. Showered. Ate some stuff. Went to school at 1:30 to help Cotey and TJ slate our video animation project. Took a lot of effort to get that sucker into iMovie and add some names and stuff. Also our project exported with deleted frames, so we had to solve that problem with Bodven's help. That took about 45 minutes. Went back home. Did mostly nothing for the rest of the day. Watched Community. It was much funnier than last weeks episode.

Err yeah. Waste of a day. Totally. Well I did some homework.

It's hard to keep enthusiasm for a project when you have to step back and think "what does it MEAN". It is counter intuitive thinking to the major. I mean, not totally opposite but it isn't demanded of us from our program.

Talked to Madeline.

I'm not itching anymore!

okie doke

Just came back from Jay's going away party. She is moving to Oakland or whatever. Not going to be in Portland. I cried like three times. I'm going to miss my dear friend.

Anyway.

Party.

I'm in no place to write right now.

Bed time.

It was an awesome day, I'll write about it tomorrow.

BYE JAY! I LOVE YOU AND WILL MISS YOU!

whooo yoga whooo

Annnd it is back to wearing pants that stop at the knee. Holy cow weather, make up your mind!

Slept in. Got to to school for student council, and then remembered that classes were cancelled today because of some teacher thing and that also meant that there would be no student council. So I put up yoga posters and ate a microwaved burrito. Which proceeded to not sit well in my stomach, so I got some french bread and hummus and gnawed on that while waiting for the illustration rendezvous.

Chelsey, Morgaine, Dom, Sivonna, Jon, Samala, Beth showed up. We chatted about the assignment and got each other on the same page. Also discussed stuff and gave feedback and bounced ideas. Some people left. We chatted some more. Got some good buzzwords and a better frame of thought for my thesis. Is it people I know...or people that are currently important to me? what format? is it art therapy or art therapized? Self helped? If I go the sort of self helped, appreciation of my wonderful friends route then I have a direction of research to go (self help books and the desire for instruction in matters of the heart) of course this is also a sort of...well sappy route I guess. But it is generating a lot of thought.

We dispearsed. I nibbled bread and got lost in thought. Then it was time for YOGA! It is BACK! WHOO!! And the first meeting had about 10 people, which was awesome. Time passed and I felt I wasn't totally horribly weak. Though I have lost some of my flexibility. Still, great to have another part of my routine back.

Returned home. Relaxed. Kristen was dying her hair. I watched Raising Hope and then Glee. Which was a very fun episode. Lots of dream sequence dancing, and of course Brittany. Great character.

Read some animation stuff.

24 Hour Fitness has no sign up fee for students. I wonder if I had access to things like treadmills, it would encourage me to bump up the cardio. I'm feeling out of shape and a little down in the dumps and that is probably both causes of inactivity. Maybe join the gym? It is right next to school. Thoughts?

mumble mumble

blaarrggghhh

it was muggy and muggy days kill productivity

just sort of sat in bed way way lay and trudged around the apartment

put away some stuff, opening up the clutter in a corner of my room

Mum sent me a really good email that gave me a good perspective to think about on my thesis, just being able to express the points without laying it all bare will be difficult

Pressure is leading me to awful awful inactivity

I need to get something to do during my days off so I don't spent them doing so much nothing

gaaah

arrggh

no class, just the illustration discussion rendezvous

which will be nice. Just discussion and getting us all on the same page, whichever page that will be.

my energy levels are really low. I just can't get psyched.

work through it all, even lunch

Just watching my Sunday tellie. Mad Men, Boardwalk Empire, and now Dexter is back! Whoo!

Slept in. Had my chocolate croissants. Went to Utrecht and got some paper. Vellum. 40 sheets. Precariously rode to school with the paper under one arm. Dropped the paper off. Got my screen and art from the studio. Photocopied and cut the stuff up to make transfers. Emulsified my screen. Talked to Carla. Exposed screens. Washed them out. Set up printing station. Picked out color. Tried to print the whole turban and text. It was too big. Printed just text. Printed face in pink. Printed turban. Printed from about..I don't know...3? to 8. It looks good. Not a very solid edition. Had problems with the flat of color. Turban looks a little crooked compared to the face. Need to take a second gander in the morning. Doesn't look as genius as I thought it did now. As I said, it needs another look. I maybe should have spent more time finalizing it and might have rushed the process. Hmmm. Still, idea to product in three days. That is pretty good.

Got home. Ate left over pasta. Watched my stories.

Tomorrow is thesis time. Time to work on thesis and think about stuff and things. Lots of stuff. Also have some reading to attend to.

Mmm.

But yeah, whoo back in the screenprinting saddle!

stu stu studio

We illustration majors are meeting on Tuesday (class is off for some reason) for an Illustration Rendezvous to discuss the assignment and help each other get on the same page. We are proactive about our success! We want to be the best ever. Be hard workers from the get go.

But the day was nice so Kristen and I walked around our neighborhood. Went to Portland Modern and looked at vintage clothing, most of it was musty and tacky and the guy would probably die from happiness if I brought in any of the actually good vintage stuff that I have (or rather mom has, because I don't fit some of that vintage wear anymore...erk I should probably exercise). But yeah, the stuff there, while well made, isn't very appealing. Bad vintage. Except for a really hot pair of shoes that look great on Kristen.

We got sushi. Just the right amount. Yum yum. Wandered around some more. I relaxed at home. And then packed up my computer at around 4:30ish and went to the studio. I spent the next five hours drawing me some Odd Owl poster art. Got the scale figured out (it will be 18x24) got the turban drawn (didn't take so long) got the face sorted out (drew it will pen in ink, not felt tip micron. I'm liking the pen nib actually, it is a little more reliable than a Micron though less transportable) got the brooch that sits on the turban drawn (took the longest to do, so much sketching and careful inking), and finally the lettering. Lettering always takes longer than I expect. Anyway, I am really excited to go and buy some paper and print this baby. Time flies when you are in the drawing zone, Top Gear is on your computer, and you have no windows to watch the sun go away.

But man do I love it. Love drawing, love when it works, love just puttering along working on something with a good show on. This is what I want to do. It really, really is.

But then I finished and went home and ate a late pasta dinner.

I'm itching a lot less. Like I still feel it, but I've been doing a lot better at holding back on the scratching.

Tomorrow I want to print. I think I'll just do a small run of posters, since it is larger. Keep it special.