best I've felt in ages

I sort of passed out at 9m, and woke up again just now, so thought I would take 30 minutes to blog and then go back to bed.

Waking up at 7am:

Suuucks. One of the hardest morning ever. Had a huge knot in my stomach for about a minute. Crawled out of bed. Showered. Ate tea and toast. Didn't bother with makeup, as I knew I'd be returning home to do it (and finish prep) anyway.

Defenses and Proposals:

Sandra's thesis defense was beautiful. She touched on all the subjects and themes succinctly and in great order. Her project was these illuminated picture boxes depicting a brothers Grimm story about this well. She constructed sets and photographed people in them. It was really nice. I'm doing thesis sketches again. It will be fun to do, because now I can just chill and draw. I have a lot of screen printing to do in the next couple weeks, but I love screen printing. And art. So yay!

Leo's proposal was full of nerves, but not full of "likes". Lots of pauses instead. Which is good. Better to pause than to use filler words. His thesis is a series of posters about people reacting to a world dominated by technology and their escape from it. His art will be amazing. He's just not the most talkative of fellows.

After that I bought a soda and cradled it preciously as I consumed its delicious caffeine. At this stage I was so tired and out of it and just trying to get nerves to calm down.

Danny's proposal was perfect really. He knew what he was doing (an all picture, no text book for his daughter) and why and the bigger picture of it. He had the art to back it up. His slide show was beautiful. Very dynamic. I can't wait to see his work unfold. We screen printers all offered to show him the ropes, because the printing for his book could be really beautiful if screen printed. White and red on black paper.

Lunch and Prep:

Yay for the school providing lunch. Had my sandwich. Sat with Kristen, Karen, Cherish, Isaiah, Cherish's mom. The latter three left and Terry, Matty, and yoga buddy whose name I keep forgetting joined us. We gabbed about this and that. At 1pm I left to go home to put my war paint on. That is, to put on dramatic makeup to get my mindset into that of a performer and stage presence. I wanted to show up and give my thesis looking awesome. The act of applying the winged eye liner and blush and lipstick and all that calmed my nerves. I also ran through my cards and noted when to switch slides. Got to school at about 2:40. Got my slide show queued up. Got the posters on all the chairs. Printed out the abstract for the panel chairs. Put on my white power boots as well.

And then the room started filling up. People I didn't recognize, people I did...TJ, Matthew Seeley, BT, Cotey, Tippi, Karen, Terry, Matty, Madeline, Michael, Mel, Bryan Columbo, Jon, James J, Dom, Sivonna, Samala, Karen, Rose Bond, Christy, Nicole, Jennifer, Amanda, Rachel, Cameron, Kinoko, Asha, Eva, Robin, Diana, Jim, Tabitha, Petra, Tibby, Heather, uhhm... more people I didn't recognize but are obviously awesome because they came to my thesis. I'm forgetting a ton of people. 10 minutes before I began and it was standing room only. There were chairs enough for 30 people, and I printed 66 posters to hand out. I had set aside six posters for some people. I put one on every chair. Karen and Terry helped pass out the posters to people as they came in. Diana got the last one! There were a couple left over once everyone filed out, but the amount that was given away indicates my thesis proposal was attended by 55-60 people!! How cool is that? Goes to show that enthusiasm breeds enthusiasm and people love free art, just as much as I love giving it out. One of my panel members didn't show, so Rose stepped in. My panel was Martin, Rose, and Kurt. Which was a great panel really. All of them knew me, knew my work, and mainly put forward ideas and suggestions instead of criticism.

The Thesis Proposal:

It went amazingly well! I was soooo nervous, but I got in some good eye contact. I mainly tried to look at Samala and BT and Mel. Try to get the corners and center of the audience when looking out. I was about fifty fifty with notecards and memory, I feel. I relied on them to avoid stumbling, but I tripped over words here and there. But I don't feel bad about it. Really, I don't think it could have gone better. The thesis came. Martin told me to start. So I did. And I went through it. And then I answered questions. It was just so fluid that I didn't really stop to think "wow that was it" till it was over. The questions were tricky, and I don't know how well I answered them. I answered them, sure, but some of the specifics might not have been there. But I left feeling good about it. I didn't spark any controversy. There wasn't a debate about logistics. The crowded room seemed very enthusiastic. And talking to people in the room before hand, people really dug the give away.

After the proposal, we all leave the room while the panel discusses. I got SO MANY high fives and hugs. It was a high five train for a bit. So much human contact. It was great! A few people stayed behind to chat and give me well wishes and more hugs. So awesome. Sucks I am nearly out of posters, but that speaks to the success of my work. The main feedback I received in the 3 on 1 was to think about what defines the success of this project, keeping track of distribution, the bigger picture outside the community and where it goes from here, and something else. I wrote it down. Also some artists to check out. It was a good little session. I answered some more of their questions, which was nice to do without the pressure of responding in the more formal manner.

So yeah, my thesis was approved. Now to spend the next six months doing it! I need to formulate a project time line. Karen mentioned that I could, based on how I work, do more than seven posters. Which I see as a possibility. The harder part will be coming up with the text. The art, no biggie right now. I have ideas. I'm just excited!! Eeee!!

Celebratin'

Did some little book keeping and bragging around school. Then I rode my bike home, obviously after switching out of my power boots. Decided to treat myself to a nice meal. Went to The Ram's Head and got a pint of Terminator Stout and the Ale Battered Fish and Chips. Popped open Packing for Mars and stuffed my face with deliciousness. The rain is back, but it is the delightful pitter patter kind. It was a good Sunday night meal.

Returned to the apartment. Talked to mom a bit. Watched some telly. Then I felt myself passing out, so I let it happen. I'm up again, but will be back in bed soon enough. I just feel really great. All the stress, all the years of build up, and it came and went and now I have something that I love that I can't wait to start doing.